What Silly Legislation Next?

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M

Mother

Guest
A place I do a bit of voluntary work at once a week has a sort of 'in
joke' sweepstake running as to what silly legislation we're going to
have to deal with next.

All of the following have been mentioned by someone or another whilst
giving evidence, we reckon some may make it into future legislation:


* "Being drunk in charge of an animal" (pet dog barking)

* "Breaking wind on public transport" (caused a fight)

* "Wearing sunglasses indoors" (asked to leave a Post Office)

* "Moving a wheelie bin after 10pm" (Neighbour dispute, fight)

* "Eating a bacon sandwich in public" (You don't want to know!)


So afl'ers, what do _you_ think may make the top 10 in future?

 
On Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:00:46 +0100, Mother <"@ {mother} @"@101fc.net>
scribbled the following nonsense:

>A place I do a bit of voluntary work at once a week has a sort of 'in
>joke' sweepstake running as to what silly legislation we're going to
>have to deal with next.
>
>All of the following have been mentioned by someone or another whilst
>giving evidence, we reckon some may make it into future legislation:
>
>
>* "Being drunk in charge of an animal" (pet dog barking)
>
>* "Breaking wind on public transport" (caused a fight)
>
>* "Wearing sunglasses indoors" (asked to leave a Post Office)
>
>* "Moving a wheelie bin after 10pm" (Neighbour dispute, fight)
>
>* "Eating a bacon sandwich in public" (You don't want to know!)
>

yes we do want to know!
--

Simon Isaacs

Peterborough 4x4 Club Chairman, Newsletter Editor and Webmaster
Green Lane Association (GLASS) Financial Director
101 Ambi, undergoing camper conversion www.simoni.co.uk
1976 S3 LWT, Fully restored, ready for sale! Make me an offer!
Suzuki SJ410 (Wife's) 3" lift kit fitted, body shell now restored and mounted on chassis, waiting on a windscreen and MOT
Series 3 88" Rolling chassis...what to do next
1993 200 TDi Discovery
1994 200 TDi Discovery body shell, being bobbed and modded.....
 
On Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:00:46 +0100, Mother <"@ {mother} @"@101fc.net>
wrote:

>A place I do a bit of voluntary work at once a week has a sort of 'in
>joke' sweepstake running as to what silly legislation we're going to
>have to deal with next.
>
>All of the following have been mentioned by someone or another whilst
>giving evidence, we reckon some may make it into future legislation:
>
>
>* "Breaking wind on public transport" (caused a fight)
>


I am firmly of the opinion that breaking wind on public transport is a
henoius crime that should be punished by death by stoning.

Alex
 

"Simon Isaacs" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> On Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:00:46 +0100, Mother <"@ {mother} @"@101fc.net>
> scribbled the following nonsense:
>
>>A place I do a bit of voluntary work at once a week has a sort of 'in
>>joke' sweepstake running as to what silly legislation we're going to
>>have to deal with next.
>>
>>All of the following have been mentioned by someone or another whilst
>>giving evidence, we reckon some may make it into future legislation:
>>
>>
>>* "Being drunk in charge of an animal" (pet dog barking)
>>
>>* "Breaking wind on public transport" (caused a fight)
>>
>>* "Wearing sunglasses indoors" (asked to leave a Post Office)
>>
>>* "Moving a wheelie bin after 10pm" (Neighbour dispute, fight)
>>
>>* "Eating a bacon sandwich in public" (You don't want to know!)
>>

> yes we do want to know!


Simon's right Martyn, we DO want to know!

Anyhow, how's about :-

"Belching in a confined public place after smoking a cigarette in the
open-air"?

or,

"Listening to the wrong type of music whilst driving a motor vehicle"?
(Apparently "The Who"'s "Won't get fooled again" has been proven to incite
breaking of speed limits)

Badger. :)


 
On Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:15:41 +0100, Alex <[email protected]>
wrote:

>I am firmly of the opinion that breaking wind on public transport is a
>henoius crime that should be punished by death by stoning.


surely they should use a gas chamber as the method of execution...

 
On 2006-04-12, Mother <"@ {mother} @"@101fc.net> wrote:

> So afl'ers, what do _you_ think may make the top 10 in future?


"Failing to give in to the demands of a person in possession of a
benefits cheque"

"Caught in possession of a reasonable argument"

"Failure to heed the demands of a rabid mob"

"Caught in possession of a wage packet"

"Driving with insurance"

"Failure to cowtow to an unreasonable demand from a policeman" (Sorry
Lee, not had much dealings with the police other than when accused of
doing something I patently didn't do)

"Being young, black and having a good job" (a friend of mine used to
get pulled over on average once a day and searched)

"Failure to observe the rules of all religions at the same time"

"Failure to display appropriate barcodes on arm"

Harrumph!

--
Blast off and strike the evil Bydo empire!
 
On or around Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:48:46 +0100, Tom Woods
<[email protected]> enlightened us thusly:

>On Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:15:41 +0100, Alex <[email protected]>
>wrote:
>
>>I am firmly of the opinion that breaking wind on public transport is a
>>henoius crime that should be punished by death by stoning.

>
>surely they should use a gas chamber as the method of execution...


lock the offender in a sealed cell with a supply of baked beans.
--
Austin Shackles. www.ddol-las.net my opinions are just that
"Something there is that doesn't love a wall."
Robert Frost (1874-1963)
 
On or around Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:00:46 +0100, Mother <"@ {mother}
@"@101fc.net> enlightened us thusly:

>* "Eating a bacon sandwich in public" (You don't want to know!)
>


yes we do...
--
Austin Shackles. www.ddol-las.net my opinions are just that
"Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose"
Alphonse Karr (1808 - 1890) Les Guêpes, Jan 1849
 
In message <[email protected]>
Mother <"@ {mother} @"@101fc.net> wrote:

> A place I do a bit of voluntary work at once a week has a sort of 'in
> joke' sweepstake running as to what silly legislation we're going to
> have to deal with next.
>
> All of the following have been mentioned by someone or another whilst
> giving evidence, we reckon some may make it into future legislation:
>
>
> * "Being drunk in charge of an animal" (pet dog barking)


That's already an offence - usually applied to horses (you
can't be done for drink-driving with a horse & cart). £30.00
fine.

<snip>

Richard

--
www.beamends-lrspares.co.uk [email protected]
RISC-OS - Where have all the good guys gone?
Boycott the Yorkshire Dales - No Play, No Pay
 
On Thu, 13 Apr 2006 08:22:46 +0100, Austin Shackles
<[email protected]> wrote:

>>* "Eating a bacon sandwich in public" (You don't want to know!)

>
>yes we do...


Remembering that all of the examples I gave were seen as petty in the
eyes of the Court and that we've developed the sweepstake as a bit of
a laugh...

Local butcher, oldest in the area decided to also open a small
sandwich outlet and became very popular for their bacon butties and
hot roast pork with crackling and apple sauce. (I'm having a Pavlovian
moment).

On the other side of the road is a Mosque, now being rebuilt to become
the largest Mosque in the North of England. Objections were raised on
the grounds that people attending the Mosque had to walk past other
people in the street who eating pork products and were deeply
offended.

I can't say any more as it all became too silly for words, similar in
fact to the case where a pensioner was forced by her Landlord
(Sheffield City Council) to remove her collection of piggy-bank
ornaments from the window sill of her living room as they were causing
offence to Muslim neighbours.

As I said earlier, a very odd sort of world we appear to be leaving
for our children.


--
Bit sad that we still, in this age of communications, have
so many folk who wear blinkers and are convinced that the
whole world is the same as their own extremely limited view
of it. Peter G Strangman Born 1937, rang-off: 1999-07-08
 

Austin Shackles wrote:
> On or around Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:48:46 +0100, Tom Woods
> <[email protected]> enlightened us thusly:
>
> >On Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:15:41 +0100, Alex <[email protected]>
> >wrote:
> >
> >>I am firmly of the opinion that breaking wind on public transport is a
> >>henoius crime that should be punished by death by stoning.

> >
> >surely they should use a gas chamber as the method of execution...

>
> lock the offender in a sealed cell with a supply of baked beans.
> --
> Austin Shackles. www.ddol-las.net my opinions are just that
> "Something there is that doesn't love a wall."
> Robert Frost (1874-1963)




Isn't just being on public transport punishment enough ! ;)

 
On Thu, 13 Apr 2006 11:45:27 +0100, "Richard Brookman"
<[email protected]> wrote:

>I am, however, surprised that the Court thought it was petty (and presumably
>dismissed the objection).


It didn't get to Court in its own right (and neither would it have
done IMO), but was used as 'evidence' (sic) in a related case - which
was also thrown out with a stern warning that should persons concerned
ever darken our bench again we'd send them down for wasting Court
time.

I really do wonder about the sanity of some folk - if the broader
population really knew how silly and petty some of the cases were,
that were sucking up taxpayer money like a Dyson, they'd all emigrate,
leaving the idiots to run the asylum.

It's no surprise, IMO, that there's such a shortage of Magistrates.


--
Bit sad that we still, in this age of communications, have
so many folk who wear blinkers and are convinced that the
whole world is the same as their own extremely limited view
of it. Peter G Strangman Born 1937, rang-off: 1999-07-08
 
On Thu, 13 Apr 2006 08:13:09 +0100, beamendsltd
<[email protected]> wrote:

>> * "Being drunk in charge of an animal" (pet dog barking)

>
>That's already an offence


Not whilst in your own home it isn't (yet).


--
"We have gone from a world of concentrated knowledge and wisdom to one
of distributed ignorance. And we know and understand less while being
increasingly capable." Prof. Peter Cochrane, formerly of BT Labs
In memory of Brian {Hamilton Kelly} who logged off 15th September 2005
 
This Mother" <"@ {mother} @ anon leet fle a fart,
As greet as it had been a thonder-dent,
That with the strook he was almoost yblent.
and said....

> Local butcher, oldest in the area decided to also open a small
> sandwich outlet and became very popular for their bacon butties and
> hot roast pork with crackling and apple sauce. (I'm having a Pavlovian
> moment).
>
> On the other side of the road is a Mosque, now being rebuilt to become
> the largest Mosque in the North of England. Objections were raised on
> the grounds that people attending the Mosque had to walk past other
> people in the street who eating pork products and were deeply
> offended.


Twenty, even ten, years ago, this would have been one of those bar-room
scare-stories like renaming Manchester "Personchester", and calling those
things in the road "personhole covers". Today, it doesn't surprise me at
all.

I am, however, surprised that the Court thought it was petty (and presumably
dismissed the objection). My guess would have been that the butcher would
be charged with inciting religious hatred and the mosque had a large cheque
from the taxpayer for their injured feelings.

> As I said earlier, a very odd sort of world we appear to be leaving
> for our children.


Indeed.

--
Rich
==============================

I don't approve of signatures, so I don't have one.


 
And by the same token, should I ever darken the streets of Mecca, could I
complain that the Muezzins call to prayer was offensive to my Christian
ears? I think not I would not keep my head for long.

Here is the ultimate irony, if this is nation is so respectful to Islam, why
the hell did we join with Loony Bush in invading Iraq and invite every
terrorist to take a pot shot at us thereafter.

And I wonder if with these new laws if what I have just said is not illegal
???? :(

--
Larry
Series 3 rust and holes


"Mother" <"@ {mother} @"@101fc.net> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> On Thu, 13 Apr 2006 08:22:46 +0100, Austin Shackles
> <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> >>* "Eating a bacon sandwich in public" (You don't want to know!)

> >
> >yes we do...

>
> Remembering that all of the examples I gave were seen as petty in the
> eyes of the Court and that we've developed the sweepstake as a bit of
> a laugh...
>
> Local butcher, oldest in the area decided to also open a small
> sandwich outlet and became very popular for their bacon butties and
> hot roast pork with crackling and apple sauce. (I'm having a Pavlovian
> moment).
>
> On the other side of the road is a Mosque, now being rebuilt to become
> the largest Mosque in the North of England. Objections were raised on
> the grounds that people attending the Mosque had to walk past other
> people in the street who eating pork products and were deeply
> offended.
>
> I can't say any more as it all became too silly for words, similar in
> fact to the case where a pensioner was forced by her Landlord
> (Sheffield City Council) to remove her collection of piggy-bank
> ornaments from the window sill of her living room as they were causing
> offence to Muslim neighbours.
>
> As I said earlier, a very odd sort of world we appear to be leaving
> for our children.
>
>
> --
> Bit sad that we still, in this age of communications, have
> so many folk who wear blinkers and are convinced that the
> whole world is the same as their own extremely limited view
> of it. Peter G Strangman Born 1937, rang-off: 1999-07-08



 
On 13 Apr 2006 01:26:18 -0700, "itcosthowmuch?????"
<[email protected]> wrote:


>> >
>> >>I am firmly of the opinion that breaking wind on public transport is a
>> >>henoius crime that should be punished by death by stoning.
>> >
>> >surely they should use a gas chamber as the method of execution...

>>
>> lock the offender in a sealed cell with a supply of baked beans.
>> --

>
>Isn't just being on public transport punishment enough ! ;)


It is if you're on my bus.....

Alex
 
Alex nearly made me spill my Shiraz on 12/04/2006 21:15 by writing:

>> * "Breaking wind on public transport" (caused a fight)
>>

>
> I am firmly of the opinion that breaking wind on public transport is a
> henoius crime that should be punished by death by stoning.


The fact that it needs to be considered at all is the reason I avoid
public transport. At least with my car I get to choose who's farts I
have to inhale, and and wind down the window to avoid the worst of them.

Andy

 
I've just come back from the States and two of the areas in California have
just brought in a ban on smoking anywhere except in your own house, but you
can only smoke there if the children aren't at home.

Personally I would like to see a ban on boring conversations in public
places. Two visitors at the country park where I work spent all lunchtime
in our tearooms discussing whether a cake was a cherry bakewell.

I would also like to see an offence created of 'Being religious in charge
of a country' When Tony Blur has a Franciscan Friar visiting him on a
regular basis, it really is time for him to step down.

It's ony a matter of time before we see Big Ben turned into a minaret and
the calls of the muezzin drown out the sound of all those Knightsbidge
Tractors taking the faithful to prey! (Deliberate mis-spelling)


If you want to discuss the content of this posting, you can find me at the
Home for the Terminally Politically Incorrect, a new institution which
escaped the notice of the press when it was created last week
Cheers, John

!


 
On Thu, 13 Apr 2006 18:50:49 +0100, "Larry" <[email protected]>
wrote:

>And by the same token, should I ever darken the streets of Mecca,


Don't misunderstand me, the 'issues' were not formally raised by the
Muslim community or anyone claiming to represent them. In the latter
case of the Granny and the piggy banks, it was actually the Council
who vastly over-reacted, much to the embarrassment of the local Muslim
community.


--
"We have gone from a world of concentrated knowledge and wisdom to one
of distributed ignorance. And we know and understand less while being
increasingly capable." Prof. Peter Cochrane, formerly of BT Labs
In memory of Brian {Hamilton Kelly} who logged off 15th September 2005
 
On Thu, 13 Apr 2006 20:37:03 +0100, Alex <[email protected]>
wrote:

>On 13 Apr 2006 01:26:18 -0700, "itcosthowmuch?????"
><[email protected]> wrote:
>
>
>>> >
>>> >>I am firmly of the opinion that breaking wind on public transport is a
>>> >>henoius crime that should be punished by death by stoning.
>>> >
>>> >surely they should use a gas chamber as the method of execution...
>>>
>>> lock the offender in a sealed cell with a supply of baked beans.
>>> --

>>
>>Isn't just being on public transport punishment enough ! ;)

>
>It is if you're on my bus.....


Isn't farting compulsory on your bus - acting as an air freshner?


(to mask the pungent stench of EP90, before you get all floral with
me...) :)




 
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