I would just like to say

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Bastids int got me flower buds eye wanted so eye is gerrin tothers. They be part code 124000. Ah wanted normal ones but pine will do. Ah bin un gotted er tape measure ter check the size. It be not that ah dun't trust em burreye wanna check fust. Am purrin tape measure back tafter.
 
Gurrafurnoon frens. Us wuz kepp out uv site urrliur, us dunno wot twas bout. Us av dun chickens an cleared grass, dun compostin an made bred, us av made chilli fer the Doris an walked dugs twice in between doin zhoppin. Us be avvin nap zoon us consider.
 
Amongst other more tedious fings, I has put a noo hairial on me Tratter.
Is a cheapy from Halfuds. It works, but I int convinced it'll last.
Is non too stiff, leans to one side, is a bit wobbly, an you puts it up by hand.
SWMBO finds that highly amoozin for some reason...
 
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Worra cr*p day. Eye went ter me castle un pulled tup me flower buds ergen. Ah got me cyclone filter un henry ter suck oot the builder rubble un dust. Eye picked the big bits oot with me and. Eye were busy pullin old cable oot and ah cut frew one with nowt ont end. Ah shudda checked it first but ah din't. Thar beer load bang un flash un lites went oot. There be no genie appeared. Bastid. Tallways works int cartoons. Ah use me meter termorra un check cable propper.
 
Whens eye got ter me castle it be neer dark. Eye put meal wurms oot fer me bobbin. Eye pulled edgar me crispmus tree oot his pot ter get rid of the bag rapped round im. Thar beer nuvva pot int side his red pot. His soil be er bit dry so eye gave him some wata fromt me wata but.

Eye were int me castle lookerin oot wench doors un eye suddenly realised me bibbon were avvin me wurms ferrits tea. Normally swoops int ter grab one then flys under is bush ter ide. But this time it were pickin one tup then turning round whyle eatered ter wotch fer safety then doing the same ergen. Eye add dark clothes ont so eye int too sure if he could see me burreye fink he could. After er bit of doing this he frewd oft ter is bush where is nest be.

Eye be lookerin ut sky behind trees finkering it beer nice site as the sun goes darn. Then somefink catched me eye. Me burd baffs be by me meal wurm feedin area. Me bobbin be avvin er splash int me burd baff. It beer special moment as ah wotched him av his tea and bed time baff one tafter tuvva. Then he frewd oft.
 
Whens eye got ter me castle it be neer dark. Eye put meal wurms oot fer me bobbin. Eye pulled edgar me crispmus tree oot his pot ter get rid of the bag rapped round im. Thar beer nuvva pot int side his red pot. His soil be er bit dry so eye gave him some wata fromt me wata but.

Eye were int me castle lookerin oot wench doors un eye suddenly realised me bibbon were avvin me wurms ferrits tea. Normally swoops int ter grab one then flys under is bush ter ide. But this time it were pickin one tup then turning round whyle eatered ter wotch fer safety then doing the same ergen. Eye add dark clothes ont so eye int too sure if he could see me burreye fink he could. After er bit of doing this he frewd oft ter is bush where is nest be.

Eye be lookerin ut sky behind trees finkering it beer nice site as the sun goes darn. Then somefink catched me eye. Me burd baffs be by me meal wurm feedin area. Me bobbin be avvin er splash int me burd baff. It beer special moment as ah wotched him av his tea and bed time baff one tafter tuvva. Then he frewd oft.

…………. to have a kip in 'is armchair.:)
 
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