greetings

hi all, this is my first post so let me introduce myself i'm a 28 years old consultant facial re-arranger, I have a 6 month old daughter that will be taking her driving test in about 4 months so i'm looking for something inexpensive and easy to fix at home, her present car is totaly knackered, the left front brake light doesn't work and we only have a small drive to work in so i was looking at the new range rover sport. DO you think i should get her a dasel or a gas model? I have a huge mansion that is tottaly surrounded by pose royces and lamberraris. and you are all welcome to come and use my private off road track. which coveres about 15 acres. Looking forward to some interesting discussion here at landy zone.

this makes interesting reading confused just a bit

who are you calling confused? do you think i'm a **** or something. my mate ant0151 told me about the derogatory things you get called in here. we're gonna come round your drum mob handed and sort you out. confused indeed.

hope yer day gets better dude

right thats it my phone number is 0898 69 69 69 and me address is c/o broadmoor prison. so if you want a fight come on down. and you better be hard

yer day aint going to get better then dude is it

right you can bugger off its that one that called my mate a **** i want. whats his name? banjobloke or summin like that.

Oh joy! Hello limp 0898! Wanna play?
Where's that faggot mate of yours?
Has he lost his bottle?
I can't send him a p.m. or email, he got scared and ran away!

right you! banjobloke WHO do you think you are calling limp? and don't you ever call my b/f a faggot. he just hasn't got around to you yet but he will. he's busy training a new bunch of real men as doormen for mothercare.
what makes you think he'd like to receive a e-mail or indeed a pm from the likes of you. you no good scottish scouse git. i'll tell you, hanging too good for the likes of you. its a good kick up the arse you need.
if you'd like some facial re-arrangment then call my number or ask and i'll get you visiting rights for a day...oh i need to go ..its a lock down..

A visit sounds great. I can bring you a nice big tub of Vaseline. Or is your poop chute so well used half a dozen of us could fall straight in?
Tell anty boy I miss him, and would like to hear from him soon.

comeon down big boy, we could do with some fresh meat in here. anthony hasn't forgotten about you, he's just too busy right now,what with him having to run his own airline and shipping company. he does say that he will be paying you a visit and once his son has been weened of tit he'll come down and throw his toys at you. so you had better be hard!.
oh! i have to go there's a cell search, seems some one has stolen the head screw's dildo.

Leeeave it mayte,! hees not wurf it!

If it's fresh meat ya want, I got just the thing. I just got a nice haunch of venison outta the freezer. If I let you have that, you can give the head screw his dildo back, make sure you wash it first.
As for Anthony being too busy with his Hair-piece and ****ting business, I call bull****. He's a chicken hearted pikey dog-fondler, and everybody's had his missus.

and everybody's had his missus.

Click to expand...

i haven't.

GRUNT said:

i haven't.

Click to expand...

Everybody except Grunt has had his missus

Not up the arse anyway.

i've not had her either but then she ain't got big tits.
have you seen on e bay the do it yerself boob job kit? its basically two cartridges of bathroom silicon sealant,a needle and thread and and nipple adapter

hey !you! banjobloke! my parole board is coming up next week so you better start your exercises and get that ky worked right in there. me and my bf anthony will be coming over you, sorry over to you. and after we're done doing you anthony is gonna get some big boys to give you a right going over.
call us ****s will you ? not again i think
you better beware cos we're hard
we make the mitchell brothers look like the fairy on yer christmas tree
ogh and that veison you have we'll be takin that when we leave

i'll kick your heads in if you keep dissing my chick

and you grunt are nothing but a thick yorkshire pudding