fickle

Today is an “ I hate the bleedin' thing day”

It's too slow and noisy and it leaks and steams up all the time so I can't see out. I have to use a squeegy on a pole to wipe the inside of the side back window when I pull out at any junction on an angle.

The steering wheel is on the wrong side so I have to keep getting out in the rain to pay for tolls and deisel.

The paint is flaking off in many places and the only way I can get the drivers door shut is by opening the window, pulling it from the outside, and then locking it quickly before it has time to pop open again.

The dog has eaten most of the interior and the headlining is held up by a small plastic box wedged into the gap by the alpine window.

The windscreen wipers are next to useless and only park properly half the time.

It has the turning circle of a drunken oil tanker and lots of the car parks round here have a height restriction of 1.9 meters.

I used to have fast, warm comfortable cars.

Mind you after 10 years of ownership I think it's the only car I've owned that hasn't dumped me at the side of the road at some time.

Currently looking forward to tomorrow when hopefully I'll feel differently.

They were all the reasons I bought one apart from the steering wheel issue, brilliant.

There's a birds mouth rubber vent on the bottom of the air (to heater box) intake. This blocks with dirt and then water build up in the duct. This causes hellish steam issues inside the Landy. If it's not that then you have water leaking in from elsewhere.
Get your arm in, past the washer water bottle, under the intake duct and feel about for the rubber birdsmouth. Give it a squeeze and hopefully a few pints of water will rush out. If it's that it makes a massive difference to the condensation inside. Having said that, do you get condensation on the windscreen?

It all sounds pretty normal. Have you thought about getting rid of the dog?

I think pictures might paint a thousand words here, I too would like to see how much the dog has enjoyed the upholstery.

Might I respectfully remind you that the Land Rover is a BRITISH ICON, and it ain't our fault if the French put all their stuff on the wrong side, is it??
As said previously, stick your mitt up the orifice and squeeze the soft bit to see if wet stuff comes out. If it does, that's much of your prolen solved.
The troule with the French is that they don't use proper, genuine British rain, so your poor baby has to work extra hard to compensate for the inferior French stuff!

I'd happily forgive them their crap rain if they would just learn how to use roundabouts properly. Or believe in the laws of physics when it comes to stopping distances. Or if even one of them ever used their indicators!!

French roundabouts are best thought of as a really sharp bendy road with lots of junctions on it !
A mates son for the last god knows how many years has never paid a motorway toll, he has an old car so just gives the barrier a nudge which then pops up and he drives on, being photographed at the same time. Allegedly he has never had a ticket as the police think they have better things to do than worry about issueing a fine when the tolls are all collected by private companies anyway.

Still haven't driven it having taken the wife's panda to the supermarket for the past couple of days. I'm sure I'll forgive it soon just haven't quiet got there yet.
Hmmm might try the nudging the barrier thing - as revenge for the car park barrier in Rennes which decided I had passed through when I had not.