Ramblers Association New Forum Member

[Ryder]

Hi folks...

Well there i was drunk and wondering how we can talk some sense into the woollie hat brigade, when I decided to do a little research. I went on to the RA forum applied for membership and started reading some of their posts.

Now I intended to get really ****ed off and want to rant at those doing the posting but in fact... and I know this isn't going to be popular... they all seem to be ranting about the same thing. Horses and their riders, and the other great evil of the countryside... cyclists.

So I have applied for membership (though you have to be vetted and approved before they let you join!) and thought I might post a few well mannered threads for the members to respond to. Of course the fact that I declared that I was a 4 x 4 petrol head in my application might sway their decision but this could turn out to be quite educational!

So what should I ask them.... hmmmmm

 

[Grippa]

You have to be vetted? To check what, that you own sensible shoes? That given half a chance you would give Janet Street Porter a quickie up the wrong 'un? WHAT?

 

[G-man]

how they like the feel of a bull bar up the arse? why they keep dropping litter on the countryside they love? how they intend to use the lanes now they are getting overgrown due to landrovers being banned

 

[Ryder]

I'm makin a list... keep em coming.... I still havent been told whether I am "suitable" for membership of the forum yet!

Maybe they want to carry out a credit check to see how much I can afford to contribute!

 

[badadj]

Good point from G- man, do they intend to set about overgrown lanes with machete's and bow saws, and some way of hauling all the rubbish away, on a regular basis?
or would they prefer someone else do it.

 

[badadj]

What are their thoughts on the proposal that people in hiking boots are causing so much soil erosion that certain well known beauty spots may well have to be closed to the public at peak times?

 

[badadj]

Do they think it might be a good idea to attach some sort of grabbing device as well as a spikey thing to the bottom of those sticks they use, so that they can pick up litter and ramble at the same time. ( Limble )

 

[Ryder]

Limbling.... this might be a whole new countryside occupation. People will become nown as Limblers and will become the dustbin lorries of the countryside!

Seriously though, I'll tell you what I find really disgusting/insulting/ and makes me wanna rip someones balls through their ears... fly tipping.

We have some wonderful lanes in Bedfordshire, but you can't go out into the countryside around Dunstable without finding that some fookin' lazy arsed skinflint plasterer/house clearance bod or out and out wonker has dunped a shedload of stuff at the side of the road.

How the hell do we teach our kids about the beauty of our lanes when they have to cope with that every five bleedin minutes.

Rant Over

Ryder