OT: New member of the Clan :-)

On Tue, 23 May 2006 23:16:32 +0100, Mother <"@ {mother} @"@101fc.net>
scribbled the following nonsense:

>On Tue, 23 May 2006 23:14:27 +0100, Alex <[email protected]>
>wrote:
>
>>It's strange, the standards and palava they go through before they'll
>>let you have a stray dog, but anyone can have a kid without so much as
>>a council permit.
>>
>>Time we had breeding licences for humans, i think....
>
>I think i'd generally agree with that - or at least some kind of test
>before the bollocks are released from cold storage for some of the
>lowlife babyfathers around here.

having spent yesterday at the maternity unit yesterday for scans with
SWMBO yesterday, I' also inclined to agree.

One delightful young chav had her usual white trainers, tracky bottoms
and boob tube top with belly hangng out, showing her belly piercing,
along with lots of other facial piercings. Moaned about having to
take out her belly piercing, moaned about having to switch her phone
off, and moaned about not being able to smoke in the hospital.... And
she was just turned 17...... innit
--

Simon Isaacs

"Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote"
George Jean Nathan (1882-1955)

ROT13 me....

Simon Isaacs wrote:

> One delightful young chav had her usual white trainers, tracky bottoms
> and boob tube top with belly hangng out, showing her belly piercing,
> along with lots of other facial piercings. Moaned about having to
> take out her belly piercing, moaned about having to switch her phone
> off, and moaned about not being able to smoke in the hospital.... And
> she was just turned 17...... innit

I didn't realise my niece had emigrated to your part of the world.

--
EMB

On Wed, 24 May 2006 21:36:02 +0100, Simon Isaacs
<[email protected]> wrote:

>On Tue, 23 May 2006 23:16:32 +0100, Mother <"@ {mother} @"@101fc.net>
>scribbled the following nonsense:
>
>>On Tue, 23 May 2006 23:14:27 +0100, Alex <[email protected]>
>>wrote:
>>
>>>It's strange, the standards and palava they go through before they'll
>>>let you have a stray dog, but anyone can have a kid without so much as
>>>a council permit.
>>>
>>>Time we had breeding licences for humans, i think....
>>
>>I think i'd generally agree with that - or at least some kind of test
>>before the bollocks are released from cold storage for some of the
>>lowlife babyfathers around here.
>
>having spent yesterday at the maternity unit yesterday for scans with
>SWMBO yesterday, I' also inclined to agree.
>
>One delightful young chav had her usual white trainers, tracky bottoms
>and boob tube top with belly hangng out, showing her belly piercing,
>along with lots of other facial piercings. Moaned about having to
>take out her belly piercing, moaned about having to switch her phone
>off, and moaned about not being able to smoke in the hospital.... And
>she was just turned 17...... innit

Midwife actually complained to Mandy that being a married,
non-smoking, home-owning expectant mother claiming no benefits of any
kind made her really dull on the forms. She was delighted to hear
that there was some Down's Syndrome history, just to give her
something to write about.

At the first antenatal class we went to there were about 50 people
there, all bar about 6 younger than me. The following week was down
to about 12.

When the nurse asked the class "what's the first thing a new parent
should be on the lookout for" a young, very keen lad of about 15 shot
his hand up and said "Paedophiles"....

--

Tim Hobbs

'58 Series 2 88" aka "Stig"
'03 Volvo V70
'06 Nissan Navara aka "The Truck"

On Wed, 24 May 2006 22:33:00 +0100, Tim Hobbs <[email protected]> wrote:

>When the nurse asked the class "what's the first thing a new parent
>should be on the lookout for" a young, very keen lad of about 15 shot
>his hand up and said "Paedophiles"....

I know it shouldn't be, but that's actually quite funny!

Mind, I know of someone who once left his 3 month old daughter on a
bus. The driver noticed and quietly questioned "have you forgotten
something?" as 'that someone' was getting off.

This was nearly 30 years ago. These days you'd have a full police
investigation, newspaper headlines and social workers foaming at the
mouth.


--
"We have gone from a world of concentrated knowledge and wisdom to one
of distributed ignorance. And we know and understand less while being
increasingly capable." Prof. Peter Cochrane, formerly of BT Labs
In memory of Brian {Hamilton Kelly} who logged off 15th September 2005

On Thu, 25 May 2006 10:25:32 +0100, Mother <"@ {mother} @"@101fc.net>
wrote:

>On Wed, 24 May 2006 22:33:00 +0100, Tim Hobbs <[email protected]> wrote:
>
>>When the nurse asked the class "what's the first thing a new parent
>>should be on the lookout for" a young, very keen lad of about 15 shot
>>his hand up and said "Paedophiles"....
>
>I know it shouldn't be, but that's actually quite funny!
>
>Mind, I know of someone who once left his 3 month old daughter on a
>bus. The driver noticed and quietly questioned "have you forgotten
>something?" as 'that someone' was getting off.
>
>This was nearly 30 years ago. These days you'd have a full police
>investigation, newspaper headlines and social workers foaming at the
>mouth.

Don't worry, it still happens. You would be amazed (or possibly not)
at the things left on buses.

My personal favourite is a wheelchair which someone once left on my
bus. Granted, they did get on carrying it under thier arm as it was a
non-access bus. The elderly lady who'd consented with very good nature
to get out of the wheelchair (rather than bitch at me for having the
"wrong" bus) managed to point it out to her (presumably) son before
i'd driven off.

The item i most prefer people to leave is thier groceries. As these
are deemed consumables, they are only kept in lost property untill the
end of the day, rather than the normal 3 months, before the driver is
entitled to claim them back. Consequently i have had some nice free
dinners on occasion.

Alex

On Thu, 25 May 2006 19:40:53 +0100, Alex <[email protected]>
wrote:

>Don't worry, it still happens. You would be amazed (or possibly not)
>at the things left on buses.

[..]

>The item i most prefer people to leave is thier groceries. As these
>are deemed consumables, they are only kept in lost property untill the
>end of the day, rather than the normal 3 months, before the driver is
>entitled to claim them back. Consequently i have had some nice free
>dinners on occasion.

Children I can truly understand - wot with the lack of sleep for 8
nights on the trot - nice to 'accidentally' lose them IMO - but food?
No chance.


--
"We have gone from a world of concentrated knowledge and wisdom to one
of distributed ignorance. And we know and understand less while being
increasingly capable." Prof. Peter Cochrane, formerly of BT Labs
In memory of Brian {Hamilton Kelly} who logged off 15th September 2005

On or around Thu, 25 May 2006 22:54:03 +0100, Mother <"@ {mother}
@"@101fc.net> enlightened us thusly:

>On Thu, 25 May 2006 19:40:53 +0100, Alex <[email protected]>
>wrote:
>
>>Don't worry, it still happens. You would be amazed (or possibly not)
>>at the things left on buses.
>
>[..]
>
>>The item i most prefer people to leave is thier groceries. As these
>>are deemed consumables, they are only kept in lost property untill the
>>end of the day, rather than the normal 3 months, before the driver is
>>entitled to claim them back. Consequently i have had some nice free
>>dinners on occasion.
>
>Children I can truly understand - wot with the lack of sleep for 8
>nights on the trot - nice to 'accidentally' lose them IMO - but food?
>No chance.

I did once leave me phone on the train. but food, no.
--
Austin Shackles. www.ddol-las.net my opinions are just that
"Quos deus vult perdere, prius dementat" Euripedes, quoted in
Boswell's "Johnson".