Posting on an internet forum is very much like making love to a beautiful woman. Start with a few warm-up exercises, introductions, banter, etc. to get all involved in the mood. Once you feel the time is right to begin your assault proper, push the button. If that doesn’t work as fully intended, keep pushing buttons until you find the right one. You’ll know when you’ve hit the spot, as you’ll be buried under a deluge of favourable responses. By now, you’ll be well into the rhythm of things, with witty asides and tales of derring-do flowing from every pore. At the exact moment you have your intended audience in the palm of your hand, finish with an erudite flourish and go for a final mop-up of any loose threads. If you’re really good, your intended will lap up everything you have to give. That’s when you know you’ve done welll. Very well. And remember, Chris, no matter how many times you’ve splurged on the internet, Swiss has done it so many more times, he has RSI.
