Buyin a freelander.

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I always had yer down as one of them there metrosexual tratterers. If yer dun't want to help nobber with his shopping bag request that's ok with us. ;)
Us tattered are all hunter gatherer types who don't do shopping, we're all red meat and grrr not canapés and nibbles. I could probably be more use telling you how many John Craddocks bags you can get in a tratter :oops:
 
Us tattered are all hunter gatherer types who don't do shopping, we're all red meat and grrr not canapés and nibbles. I could probably be more use telling you how many John Lewis bags you can get in a tratter :oops:
Any idea how many John Lewis bags yer can get in a Freelander?
 
So, if I wanted to go off road in one, say , up a small kerb or over some gravel, would I be able to? How do they cope with puddles?
 
So, if I wanted to go off road in one, say , up a small kerb or over some gravel, would I be able to? How do they cope with puddles?
The kerb you fell up last week wouldn't be a problem. We don't have issues with puddles. Max depth is 500mm but as with any vehicle yer still need to be careful. Water can get in. Alternators are sometimes lower down depending on the model. I don't take mine in deep water anymore as it contains sand, clay and mud. All of which is bad for oil seals and bearings. Also yer has to clean it afterwards which gets boring.
 
So, if I wanted to go off road in one, say , up a small kerb or over some gravel, would I be able to? How do they cope with puddles?
I once went green laning with a bloke driving a hippo and it was fairly capable but it did spend quite a lot of time dragging itself along the ruts on its back box of its exhaust.
 
If I was to put a cb whip antenna on one with a brightly coloured flag on it would that be best so I could still be seen in long grass?
 
If I was to put a cb whip antenna on one with a brightly coloured flag on it would that be best so I could still be seen in long grass?
You'd stand a better chance putting a leather studded thong on there then other hippo drivers would actively hunt you down :D. I'm sure @Hippo can lend you one of his if it hasn't rotted already although baby oil is a good preservative
 
You'd stand a better chance putting a leather studded thong on there then other hippo drivers would actively hunt you down :D. I'm sure @Hippo can lend you one of his if it hasn't rotted already although baby oil is a good preservative

Cool, most importantly though, is there somewhere in the door card to store a hair dryer? You know how you always seem to need one quick if caught in a drizzle.
 
I reckon I could fit three hippo drivers in their lubed up gimp outfits in the back of my tratter, so if you and your boyfriends break down on the way back from the private club I should be able to squeeze you in.
That type of offer won't be accepted under any circumstances. We don't partake in any such activities. Giving you the benefit of the doubt, yer may have posted the above innocently. I have suspicions it contains a hidden message only understood by thems who do partake in such activities.

Anyways yer be better oft getting 3 people to push yer tratter than the suggested above. Has it moved by it's own drive/mechanicals in the last 6 months? Yer knows the rules. It's considered a garden ornament by definition if it hasn't.
 
I once went green laning with a bloke driving a hippo and it was fairly capable but it did spend quite a lot of time dragging itself along the ruts on its back box of its exhaust.
Ground clearance is the only problem we face. Freelanders being light with clever traction control systems and independent suspension are our secrete weapons. The benefits of which have stood the test of time and become a must on all LR products designed/built after the Freelander (including the new tratter).
 
If I was to put a cb whip antenna on one with a brightly coloured flag on it would that be best so I could still be seen in long grass?
I think yer getting mixed tup. Thems orange flags are used on bikes and ped's. May I kindly suggest yer fek oft to a ped forum and fill yer boots. And take marmaduck with yer.

This ere Freelander section is a respectable part of the forum and therefore doesn't take kindly to fat slobs loitering with intent on mischievous happenings. Be oft with yer.
 
Cool, most importantly though, is there somewhere in the door card to store a hair dryer? You know how you always seem to need one quick if caught in a drizzle.
Have you not seen pictures of Gerry McGovern when he was designing Freelander? Of course he put hair dryer holders in each of the front doors!
So, if I wanted to go off road in one, say , up a small kerb or over some gravel, would I be able to? How do they cope with puddles?
You have to be careful with puddles, cos you have to go back and retrieve your hair dryers from the doors.

GerryMcGovern.jpg
 
Anyways yer be better oft getting 3 people to push yer tratter than the suggested above. Has it moved by it's own drive/mechanicals in the last 6 months? Yer knows the rules. It's considered a garden ornament by definition if it hasn't.
From a couple of weeks ago.


Mine went through this and the doors didn't fall off.



A picture no freelander driver has seen which is the start of strata florida.



An action shot from happy valley in mid Wales, please note that no tow rope was required and no bits fell off.

So come on @Hippo and @GrumpyGel share your green laning exploits :D
 
Ground clearance is the only problem we face. Freelanders being light with clever traction control systems and independent suspension are our secret weapons.

I don't see how dragging yer sen along on the rear silencer is a worthy design feature :p
Oh and I assume you meant to put secret and not secrete as no one really wants to know what secretions you hippo boys get up to in yer grassy fields
 
From a couple of weeks ago.


Mine went through this and the doors didn't fall off.



A picture no freelander driver has seen which is the start of strata florida.



An action shot from happy valley in mid Wales, please note that no tow rope was required and no bits fell off.

So come on @Hippo and @GrumpyGel share your green laning exploits :D
Strata Florida eh? No Freelanders eh?

What car or where is my brother then? Cos he must have been telling fibs :) :)

Strata_1.jpg


Strata_2.jpg


Strata_3.jpg


Strata_4.jpg
 
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