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Evenin volks. Tis more an enuff fer one dai, us off tu us scratcher. Zwete dremes orl.

Gude renny mornin vrum Debn, volks. BBC zez as ow The Hummer uv Holyrood av walked away: anny chance the Auld Incumbent will offer er services agen?

Whilst standing on your head in a ballet tutu and whistling Scarpia’s Theme from Tosca.

Thass moreun enuff fer one weak end, volks. Us boys off tu push oat zum zeds. Zleep well, frens.

Morning orl! Tis drai doan yer zo oat tu river urly wivvus dugs. Em huntid scentline tu the riverbank an inneruptid an odder aboat is brekfust. Twassa lamprey, zo us lobbed it in after im zo dugs diddun geddun. River be zo clean now after orl ren us av ad.

Go on…..say “the doors will fall off”. You know you’re dying to. 🙄

An fule economery anorl.

Mornin orl. Be rennin doan yer zo wurk is bess place tu be. A nudder tulebox dai! Av a gude’n, volks.

Us boys dun enuff ferra week but SWMBO be on naights this weak end zo us goan in termorra moornin tu ledder zleep. Tis a few moor beer tokens anorl. Gude naight, volks!

Gude moornin volks. Tis Vridy zo us oft tu wurk agen. Avva lovely dai!

Us boys ab allus wanted a Deafener but us carnt justify 3 vehicles and couldn’t park more than 2. FL2 is best choice fer us poisonal circumwhatnots. Us av tu zay as how Octavia combi does a gude job ont long-distance wirk but be toad alley characterless an zhyte in snow!

Evenin volks, Us boys tryin tu be moor attentive tu us responsibilities on yer. Tis important tu old up the honour uv hippos int face uv criticism zo will tek moor notice in future!

Us boys can fink uv reasons tu own most Lanrovers 'cep Evoke, Disco Sport or new Deafener but F2 duz job best uv the bunch givven us duddun want tu draive a 109 tu Isle uv Skye vrum Deb'n or pay £700 a yur woad tacks ferra Wange Wover!! :D

Arvdernune, frens. Yer Devonguy av bin absinthe ferra wile, tis true but opin yer orl still well an appy. Us still mourning loss of Hippocrates and plannin tu buy a F2 ledder this yur as us as lost 3 dogs this yur an can go back tu a smaller boot space. MAIN REASON FER POST Us av gorra cancer...

These are pretty good, use mine professionally. https://amzn.eu/d/1iSQgdJ

Hmmmm…..dunno if I can help. iPhone SE 2020 and I keep it up to date with all software, 2014 Skoda Octavia with Bluetooth and I have no trouble using music, satnav and phone from the iPhone. Perhaps a hard reset of your phone and a battery disconnect on the car might shock the systems and make...

Evening orl. That be annudder week dun, twer a bit ard but wurk be laike that. Us boys maight du a bidduv oavertaime at the weak end iffn it rains! Av bin missin us Hippo this week: he wuz shorefootid int vrosty an ice. Can’t wait until natural attrition means us av few enuff dugs tu vit int...

Us boys loves a bitta turnin, tu. Us only as a wee lathe as us only assa wee shed but tis mazin wot can be maid oat uv a beech rolling pin. Her’s goan tu wurk oat where em orl go one day….

Tiddun no gude. Us bin stuck indoors orl day nursin a cold but feelin unfulfilled an laike us be a burden on society. Us avvin a shower an goan doan pub tu du us civic duty. Once standards start tu slip, democracy be at risk an the fabric uv us fragile liberties be threatened. Wish us boys well...

Mornin orl! Us boys bin oat wiv us dugs an borted bread an a noose paper. Bügger wurk an gardnin tuday, us goan tu hole up by fire wiv hankies a whisky. Av great days frens.