Was following a motor bicyclist yesdi. Stoppin and startin frew traffic. Feet were moving about as if e were dancin. How does yer change gear? Does it slot in and have a spring back to neutral. Ow many gears? Answers. Eye need answers.

Fink eye may have upset me squirrels. Left kev's trap set yesdi day time. Somefink triggered it and it moved a but. Peanut butter is in a hole fing under the trap trappin bit. Bit on top and some int hole gone. So eye is guessing it were a squirrel as some have stopped visiting last nite and...

Loads ov stuff felled oft. Including arf the windscreen.

Trap was triggered last nite. Fink it were done when it were pushed over a bit. Guessing it were a fox. There's a brick on top ov the plastic box to keep it in place. Eye topped up the peanut butta. Also put some in me second trap. Then moved it mear to a hole eye fink kev uses to hide under me...

Looks like flood damaged.

Can hear somefink struggling to get into a nut. Fink its kev.

Must be baby squirrel season. Little one on me garage watchin me frew the window. Eye ignored it finkin it be ok where eye was int kitchen. Burrit din't come down ferra nut so musta bin put oft.

Done nowt but eat, wash and look at the web today. Just means more to do morra. Going to av 2 crumpets now.

Is that cus its got an eye and its mouth open?

Shed on wheels it is then. Norra tratter this time. A caravan.

Bacon, chips and tomatoes fer lunch.

Cheap bnb. Premiere inn has baffs and/or showers.

Faggots, chips n pea's for tea last nite. Hovered ma hippo last nite. Pumped up is tyres.

Peanut butter out for kev. Just bort it back in. Ungrateful little fing.